Collateral Damage
by FrozenFractals
Summary: "You didn't believe Titans had hearts. But they do. And yours is breaking." - Mikasa visits Annie in prison [Mikaani]


**A/N: **Set after Chapter 33. Annie is no longer in her crystal.

* * *

Footsteps.

You listen to them carefully.

You've been down here for days. Or weeks. It's hard to tell. But it's been long enough. Long enough for you to have memorised Nile's brusqe way of striding over the cobblestones that make up the floor of this cold prison, or the sound of Erwin's measured gait as he mulls over his newest line of interrogation before he lets the words loose to bounce around your cell.

So from the moment you hear them, you know these footsteps are different. They have strength. Purpose. But they're soft, in a way that few people you know can manage-

"Annie."

Her voice caresses your skin, but it leaves a sting in your heart. You look up.

And lose your breath.

You've spent countless hours staring into the shadows of your prison, seeing her dark eyes and gentle face staring back, keeping you company as sleep eluded you. You've traced the curve of her neck and mapped the muscles of her shoulders with your tongue a thousand times. You should remember her perfectly.

But as she stands in front of you now, you realise that even the sharpest mind couldn't ever hope to recreate Mikasa Ackerman.

It makes you angry. It makes you feel like a failure.

The way she's looking at you now makes you feel like a failure.

You glare at her through the bars.

"Mikasa."

She doesn't move. You'd expected the bite in your voice to make her at least tug on that scarf. You know she does it when she's nervous.

You used to make her nervous. You used to be able to make her blush with a single glance.

Her hair sweeps against the collar of her jacket as she moves towards the bars. It's getting long again. You like it long.

_CLICK_.

You try not to show your surprise as she unlocks the cage and steps inside, watching you the whole time. She's not afraid. It makes you feel like a failure again.

You stand, and take a step towards her. She tilts her head slightly. A challenge. 'Scare me.' Her eyes dare you. 'Give me an excuse to let go.'

You probe for a weakness. "How's Eren?"

She doesn't flinch. "Recovering." Her voice is even. Undeterred.

You try again. "Levi?"

Her eyes flash. You give her a humourless grin. She knows what you're asking. She knows you want her to remember the broken, bleeding forms of the Special Operations squad. She knows you're looking to ignite that fire. The one that engulfs her normally cool demeanour, leaving her raw and open, allowing you to delve in and take what you want.

But she doesn't let you. Not yet.

So you push harder. "Why did you come here?" You ask, unblinking.

She hesitates, and you realise she doesn't know either. It's your opening. "Did you come here to see if it was really me?" You smile, baring your teeth. "To see if you really let yourself be fucked by a Titan?"

_CRACK ._

Your cheek stings, and you taste blood. A jolt of pain streaks through you, but it's not from the slap. It's from the way her lower lip trembles. The way her breathing grows shallow as she stares at you, a glimmer of hurt shining in her eyes.

"Why?" she whispers, voice breaking. You've started that fire. You're in control now. "Why did you lie to us?" She blinks back tears, but one escapes, tracing a wet path down a pale cheek, disappearing under her jawline. "To me?"

You thought you were in control.

You're not.

You didn't believe Titans had hearts.

But they do. And yours is breaking.

"I never lied." You reply. "I just didn't tell you everything." It sounds like an excuse. You hide behind an accusation. "Just like _you_ never told _me_ everything."

Like why she acts as though she has a debt to Eren that she can never hope to repay. Why she trusts in her gear more than she trusts in other human beings.

Why she chose you.

"You lied," she says again, and suddenly you realise she's not talking about what you hid from her, but rather, what you didn't hide. "You said you lov-"

You shoot a hand out to press your fingers against her lips. Another tear falls, and you watch it, unable to meet her eyes.

Suddenly you want to agree with her. Tell her that everything you whispered against her skin in the early hours of the morning was a lie. That she's not the best thing that's ever happened to you. That she's not the first person who made you feel human.

That you don't love her.

But you do. Fuck. You really do.

Your eyes flick back to hers. "I never lied." You repeat it, slower this time, waiting for her to understand. She does, and she comes undone, pushing your arm aside and grabbing a fistful of your dirty sweater, pulling your lips to her own.

Her kiss is as desperate as she is. Her tongue forces its way into your mouth, searching for answers. Searching for a reason to trust you again.

Fingernails dig into the nape of your neck, and you feel hot tears against your face.

Your heart lurches when you realise they're your own.

She pulls back, brow furrowing. "You're crying." Like she can't decide if you're just pretending.

The lump in your throat seemingly came out of nowhere. So you try to speak to her with a look instead.

She reads it, and her eyes widen. "Annie…" she breathes. The way she says your name sometimes. It makes you feel like you're worth something. "You didn't want to do this, did you? You didn't want to kill anyone." She places a palm against your face, a calloused thumb stroking your cheekbone. "You were forced into this."

You say nothing.

She pushes her forehead against yours, her breath ghosting across your lips. "They're going to punish you," she says, and you feel the hand at your chest grip the fabric even tighter. "They're going to kill you for what you've done."

You know that. You haven't come to terms with it, but you know it's true.

"I can't-" She squeezes her eyes shut, fighting tears. "I _won't_ let them kill you for something you didn't _want_ to do." She pounds the hand against your chest, as if trying to draw strength from your aching heart. She opens her eyes again, and for the second time that night, the air leaves your lungs.

"I can't lose you," she confesses, and from the rawness of her voice, you know it's the first time in her whole life that she's admitted to needing someone other than Eren. "I love you."

You stay silent. You're not a liar. You do love her. You just don't tell her everything.

It doesn't matter though, because when she kisses you again, you can tell she already knows.


End file.
